how can it be?

my oldest sons 24th birthday arrived today. it will be the only time in our lives where we can double his age to reach mine... it is a time where you remember your youth, what it was for me to be 24 myself, where did i live, where did i work? who was i way back then...

and holding him for the first time, how little he was, wrapping my dreams around him like the soft blanket that kept him warm....stirring the lioness in me to keep him safe...knowing nothing would be able to hurt him if he were in my arms...

i'm very proud of who he is...i would chose him for a friend myself if i were to meet him as a stranger. he's highly intelligent, brave, makes me laugh, kind and has a loving heart. he works with the elderly in a home and says the best part of his day is talking with them...never have i heard him say he hasn't had a good day at work or that he is tired, he loves people and loves his job.

at heart, he is a musician...he composes music in his own code, never learning how to read music. he plays by ear, and i haven't heard an instrument that he couldn't play by just listening to somebody play it... it was just a few months ago when i spotted a piano on the side of the road with a "free" sign. i stopped by his place to let him know and he and a friend drug that piano home... i wasn't even aware that he played the piano, but he does. his music isn't at all what i would've guessed he would write, (not at all like the annoying music he listened to in his teenage years), it is more like movie scores with depth...intricate instruments woven throughout a piece...

after all the years of dreaming (what i find were my dreams) for my children...the peace that you find when you see your children happy with who they are, what they do and who they have as friends is really all a parent could wish for. it's not where they live, what they have, or how much money they make, sacrifices have to be made for those things to become who you want to be or to use the gifts that you have. my hopes and dreams for him were totally changed throughout our relationship, i finally realized, he does know what is best for him.

make a wish baby....